Heal the hurt
by thegirl20
Summary: During 'Fury', Kahlan asks the healer to help Cara.


Kahlan watched Roga walk away, feeling her body hum with something akin to the fury Richard had exhibited earlier. She glanced down at Cara's prone body, so small and broken. So far removed from how Kahlan had come to view her; strong and almost invulnerable. She brushed her fingers over Cara's cheek, ignoring Richard's guilty mutterings before turning and striding into the healer's hut.

-

"Heal her."

Roga turned, her expression as serene as ever, as if she had expected this.

"Mother Confessor, I cannot," she said, quietly. "Everything that her kind stands for is violent in nature. She is the antithesis of my people. If I were to heal her and she were to kill innocents, their blood would be on my hands."

"And what of the innocents she will save?" Kahlan countered. "She travels with the Seeker, protects him, what if his quest should fail because she's not there to watch over him? Then all of mankind is doomed. Are you willing to risk that on your hands?"

This seemed to give the woman pause.

"I…I cannot…"

Kahlan pressed the advantage.

"You're right," she said, moving closer and putting her hand on the healer's arm. She looked into her eyes. "She was brought up as an instrument of war, a weapon for Darken Rahl to wield at will…but she stood in front of me today and took a blow for me. Me. A confessor. There's no-one in the world she should hate more than me. And now she might die because she was brave enough to risk her life to save mine."

Kahlan was surprised to feel a tear run down her cheek. By saying these words out loud, it was like she was allowing herself to think them for the first time. And the thought of Cara dying brought her more sadness than she could adequately express. The healer was obviously still troubled.

"But if it is the Creator's will…" she began.

"It is _not_ the Creator's will!" Kahlan snapped, her eyes blazing. "It is _your_ choice. Can you truly call yourself a healer if you choose who lives and who dies? By doing so you elevate yourself to the Creator's level."

"I do no-"

Kahlan held up her hands for silence.

"As the Mother Confessor, I am _ordering_ you to heal her," she said, quietly but firmly. "And if you do not, I will confess you and command you to do so. Either way, she will be healed."

Roga's eyes dropped to the floor in deference to Kahlan's position. But when she spoke, her voice held the same steel that Kahlan's had.

"I will heal the Mord'Sith," she said.

"Cara," Kahlan bit out. "Her name is Cara."

"I will heal Cara as you request," she said. "But perhaps the Mother Confessor should think about her own willingness to remove someone's free will." She looked up at Kahlan. "Is that so different from taking a life?"

Kahlan frowned.

"I confess people when it is necessary for the greater good," she said.

"And I heal people for the same reason," the healer said. "Perhaps we both make judgements on what constitutes the greater good."

Kahlan absorbed this thought. Were her own decisions so different? Had she not been ready to condemn Cara to death not so long ago? Her hand twitched at her side as she recalled the smooth skin of Cara's neck against her palm.

"Just…heal her," she said, finally, in a whisper. "Please don't let her die."

The healer nodded.

"You must care for her very much."

"She's my friend," Kahlan said, the words sounding strange to her ears.

-

Cara became aware of a pounding in her head. She had to think very hard for a moment to decide whether or not she had frequented a tavern the night before. A shadow fell over her still closed eyes and she opened them, expecting to see Kahlan glaring at her, or Richard trying not to laugh. Instead Roga's face swam into her vision and the reason for the pain in her head came back to her. She attempted to sit up, but a strong hand on her shoulder pressed her back.

"Stay down," the healer warned. "That was quite a blow you took. You'll likely be woozy and nauseous for a while yet."

Cara swallowed against a dry throat.

"Didn't think you'd heal my kind," she said, her voice rough. Her head was swimming from the small amount of movement she'd attempted so she closed her eyes again.

"Neither did I," the Roga said, over the pounding. "You had a very passionate supporter."

Cara hummed. Richard did love the opportunity to stand up for the underdog. Then again, she supposed he owed it to her. Given that he had been the one to hit her in the head in the first place. A cold cloth was pressed against her forehead and she allowed her eyes to flutter open. The healer was looking down at her, appraising her.

"It's not everyone who would have the Mother Confessor plead for their life," Roga said, still wondering whether she had made the right choice.

The surprise caused Cara to jolt upright, regretting it a second later as she was once again pressed back against the bed, her vision blurring, blood rushing in her ears. She pulled in long, controlled breaths to try to ward off the dizziness. When it dissipated, the healer was shaking her head.

"Didn't I just tell you to stay down?" she scolded.

"Kah-…" Cara began, swallowing with difficulty. "Kahlan asked you to heal me?"

Roga laughed, standing to fetch a bowl of water and bringing it to Cara's dry lips.

"Drink this. It will take away the dizziness. And asked? No. Ordered? Yes," she said, smiling again at the look of confusion on Cara's face as she drank. "This surprises you?"

Cara briefly wondered if she was still unconscious and dreaming this whole thing.

"I…" she began, having no idea if she was surprised or not. She was saved from having to decide by a knock at the door. Cara turned to see Kahlan's head peeking around the door.

"How's the patient?" she asked, her look of concern melting into a smile when she saw Cara's eyes were open. "Hey…how are you feeling?"

She came further into the room. Roga moved and Kahlan took her place, perching on the side of Cara's bed.

"I feel fine," Cara lied.

Kahlan rolled her eyes and turned to Roga.

"How is she feeling?" she asked, knowing she'd get no admissions of weakness from the Mord'Sith.

"She's dizzy and nauseous, but that will wear off with the herbs I've given her," she said, as she tidied some bandages. "And I'll warrant that her head is sore…hard though it is."

Kahlan laughed and turned back to Cara, looking down at her with ill-disguised amusement at the healer's description.

"She's hard headed, alright," she said.

"Where's Richard?" Cara asked, to get away from the subject of her head, which was _really_ starting to hurt.

Kahlan brushed her fingertips gently over Cara's forehead, just above her eyebrow. Cara told herself that the reason she didn't flinch away from the contact was that it would've caused more pain in her head than was necessary. So she bore Kahlan's fussing with minimal complaint. The healer excused herself, leaving the two women alone in the hut.

"He's moping around outside," Kahlan told her, in a loud whisper. "He's afraid you don't want to see him. I think he's working out an apology speech."

"He doesn't have to apologise," Cara said, her voice weaker than usual. "He wasn't himself."

"I think he's concerned that he was able to raise his sword against you…against both of us," Kahlan said, her earlier smile fading. "He could have killed you."

"Pffft," Cara scoffed. "As if a little blow to the head could kill me."

"It could have," Kahlan insisted. "It nearly did. So don't brush it off like it's nothing. You put yourself between me and that sword and…I…thank you."

Cara stared at Kahlan for a moment, unsure how to reply.

"I don't know what I was thinking," she said, eventually. "I should have let him hit you and then brought you back with the Breath of Life…instead I ended up unconscious and of no use to anyone. It was a foolish mistake."

Kahlan smiled slowly. Though it sounded harsh, she knew that Cara was berating herself for exposing her vulnerability; her _feelings_. She shook her head.

"Well, next time you can let him hit me," she assured the pouting blonde. "And we're all a little foolish from time to time."

"You ordered the healer to heal me," Cara blurted out. "Why?"

Kahlan coloured, a blush creeping up her neck. She looked down, avoiding Cara's eyes.

"Maybe for the same reason you took the blow for me," she said, her voice quiet. "I didn't want you to die."

Though they had probably saved each other in battle many times over, there was something about saying it out loud that made it more real. Cara felt a blush start to spread across her own face and fought against it. She coughed to cover her embarrassment and then winced, groaning at the pain that bloomed through her skull. Then the cool cloth was back, Kahlan's hand on her cheek, her thumb brushing over the skin under her eye. Cara couldn't even begin to come up with an excuse for not moving away from the touch this time.

When the pain subsided, she opened her eyes reluctantly, expecting Kahlan to insist on more talk of emotions. She didn't expect Kahlan to lean down and press a kiss against her forehead. But that's what Kahlan did. It was only when Kahlan sat back up that Cara realised she hadn't felt lips touch her skin. She tried to ignore just how much she longed to have felt just that.

She reached up to touch her own head, her hand coming into contact with some bulky piece of fabric. Cara frowned.

"What is this?" she asked, pulling at it until Kahlan took her hand away.

"It's a bandage," she said. "Your head is hurt."

"A _bandage_?" Cara said. "I sleep with a blanket smaller than this thing. Take it off."

Once again, Cara reached for the offending article and Kahlan caught her hand and held it tightly.

"Leave it alone," Kahlan warned, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "It's for your own good."

Cara snorted. "I fail to see how wrapping my head in bed linen is going to do me any good," she protested. "I think that healer just wanted me to look ridiculous so that everyone would stare at me."

Kahlan tilted her head to the side, the edges of her lips fighting a smile.

"Says the woman in the skintight red leather suit," she teased. Cara was about to protest when Kahlan continued. "I don't think you need any help in getting people to look at you, Cara."

Cara was confused. Now it sounded like Kahlan was flirting with her. Cara had never been much for that kind of thing. She tended to favour straightforward seduction over frivolous flirting. She sighed. Her head was too sore to try to figure this out. She started to sit up, grunting a little with the effort. Kahlan grabbed her arm to help her.

"Should you be sitting up?" Kahlan asked, worry creasing the patch of skin between her eyebrows.

"I'm fine. The dizziness has almost gone," Cara said, amazed to find that was mostly true. Those herbs the healer had given her must really have worked.

She sighed again and looked at Kahlan, her new position meant that they were in very close proximity.

"I didn't want you to die either," Cara admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

Before Kahlan could respond, or even break into a smile, Cara's lips were covering her own in a kiss that was almost chaste.

Cara drew away before she was tempted to push for more. Her mind was already explaining the action away; she was delirious with pain, the herbs were affecting her strangely. She just hoped Kahlan didn't slap her. Because that, on top of her already pounding head, would really hurt.

Kahlan didn't look like she was going to hit her. She didn't look like she was going to pull her in for another kiss either, but that was okay.

"You kissed me."

"I'm in pain," Cara retorted.

"I…," Kahlan paused, realising something. "You just admitted to being in pain," she said with a grin. "And, in pain or not, you still kissed me."

Cara groaned.

"I meant to say that the herbs must have affected my mind."

"You seem to be thinking clearly enough to be making excuses for _why_ you kissed me," Kahlan shot back.

"Can you stop saying I kissed you?" Cara begged, lying back down and closing her eyes. "I'm sorry."

There was a long pause. Or, at least, it felt long to Cara.

"I liked it."

Cara cracked open an eye to find Kahlan blushing furiously. She smirked.

"Of course you did. I'm very good at it."

Kahlan's lips formed a thin line and Cara waited for the inevitable rebuke. It didn't come.

"What about Richard?" Kahlan asked in a whisper, putting a hand to her chest.

Cara laughed.

"Don't concern yourself, Kahlan," she said, putting two fingers to her temple and rubbing to try to alleviate the pain. "It was a kiss. I won't insist that you elope with me."

Her fingers were gently nudged aside and Kahlan took over, rubbing both of her temples with delightful pressure. Cara almost purred in appreciation.

"You liked it too," Kahlan said, and Cara was impressed by the confidence in her mouth. The Mother Confessor wasn't quite as innocent as people gave her credit for.

"I did," Cara said with a shrug, still enjoying Kahlan's attentions. "But I shouldn't have done it. You're with Richard and he's the Lord Rahl and it was wrong of me."

"But it felt right," Kahlan continued. "It felt like…I want to do it again, to be sure."

Cara opened her eyes, one of her eyebrows almost disappearing underneath the ridiculous bandage.

"You want to do it again? Now?" she asked, just to clarify.

"Yes," Kahlan said with a firm nod. "Now. Before I lose my nerve. Or before the herbs wear off."

Cara grinned at Kahlan's teasing. She sat up, her body gliding through the air fluidly. Then she remembered the huge thing wrapped around her head and decided that any attempts to look alluring were futile. She tilted her head.

"Go on then," she challenged. "Do it again."

Kahlan rolled her eyes.

"Fine," she said, leaning in and pressing her lips against Cara's, moving against her mouth tenderly.

Cara had been planning not to react, to let Kahlan take the lead. But that really wasn't in her nature and she found her hand going to Kahlan's back, pulling her closer, deepening the contact. Then Kahlan's lips parted and Cara was lost. She picked up the pace and attacked Kahlan's mouth, licking and nipping at her lips before plunging her tongue deep inside. Kahlan did her best to keep up, teeth clashed and noses bumped and it was only when their foreheads came together in a relatively violent collision that they parted with Cara trying not to cry out in pain.

Kahlan was breathing heavily when she looked at her, her eyes almost as dark as when her confessor magic took over.

"Are you okay?" she panted, noticing Cara cradling her head with her hand.

"Of course I am," Cara said, batting Kahlan's hand away from her injury. "Are you?"

Kahlan appeared to take a moment to consider this. She let out a long breath.

"I...I think maybe I've been doing that wrong before," she admitted with a smile.

"I thought you were quite good at it," Cara said with a shrug, trying to ignore her hammering heart.

Kahlan laughed. "Gee, thanks, Cara."

"It was a compliment. I don't give those often," Cara said, a little confused by Kahlan's reaction.

"I know," Kahlan said, sobering. "I'm just a little thrown. This is unexpected."

"Not really," Cara said. "I find you very attractive. You find me attractive. It's quite simple."

"It's not," Kahlan said, shaking her head. "We're...us. And...there's Richard."

"It's only not simple because you choose to complicate things," Cara argued. "If we find each other attractive and wish to take pleasure in each other, that should be all that matters."

Kahlan looked at her and Cara thought she must have said something wrong. Kahlan's mouth was turning down.

"Is...is that all you want? Pleasure?" she asked. "Do you even _like_ me? Or do you just like how I look?"

Cara barely resisted the urge to sigh. Women.

"Kahlan, I already told you that I didn't want you to die," she said, wearily.

"And...that means you like me?" Kahlan asked, sounding unsure.

"If that's how you want to look at it," Cara said, sighing.

"Such a romantic," Kahlan mumbled, though her smile was coming back.

"That I will _never_ be," Cara said, seriously. "But I am not opposed to pleasure. Though we may need to investigate how to go about that without you confessing me to death."

Kahlan's face fell and Cara found herself wanting to see her smile again.

"Don't worry, I have ideas," she confided.

Kahlan laughed and shook her head, leaning in to kiss Cara's lips softly.

"I look forward to hearing them," she murmured.

"I'm not much of a talker," Cara said. "I'll probably just show you."

Another knock on the door caused them to spring apart just as Richard entered, looking ashamed.

"How's your head?" he asked, gently.

"Fine," Cara told him, turning to Kahlan with a smirk. "Kahlan kissed it better."


End file.
